Brief an die gastfamilie

Austauschschüler Forum Vor dem Auslandsjahr
1

Hallo,
ich bin gerade dabei einem Brief an meine gastfamilie zu schreiben, ich finde das es aber noch zu wenig ist, habe aber keinen richtigen plan mehr was ich noch schreiben könnte:(
das habe ich bis jetzt geschrieben:

Hello family Thea & Carl Webb,

I´m Paula, come from germany and I´m glad to be able to
come to southafrica!
At first I would like to thank you very much, that I can stay for four
weeks with you.
I live in W., near D., I´m 15 years old and I´m in 9th grade
at grammar school.
I like meet my friends, play in
a band and I love animals. We have three guinea pigs, two budgies and
three „Degus“ (I don´t know what it mean in english).
In my family there are my parents and my brother F. My brother is
9 years old and visits the 4th class, my mother is 36 years old and my
father is 39 years old. My parents are both photographers.

Danke schon mal im voraus
lg Paula:)

2

Hallo Paula,

in dem Elternbrief geht es ja hauptsächlich darum, dass deine Gastfamilie Informationen über dich und dein Leben bekommt. Deshalb ist das wichtigste, dass du deinen eigenen Charakter beschreibst und deinen Eltern erzählst was du gerne in deiner Freizeit machst oder vielleicht wie ein normaler Tagesablauf bei dir aussieht.

Als Anregung stell ich einfach mal meinen Elternbrief rein :wink: Kannst dir ja was abgucken was dir gefällt aber für die Grammatik übernehme ich noch keine Haftung :wink: Die muss mein Englischlehrer nochmal abchecken :wink:

Dear host family,

First of all, I want to thank you for giving me the chance to spend on year in the USA. My name is Jennifer Scheuren. My friends usually call me Jenny. I’m a fifteen year old girl from Dortmund in Germany. Dortmund is a comparatively big city with more than 586.909 townsfolk. The brand mark of Dortmund is ab big television tower, which is called “Florianturm”. I live in a small flat with my mother Manuela, wo is 41 years old.She works as a bank counselor in a big bank. I love my mother and I have a really good realtionship to her an that made my decission harder to spend one year in America because it means I have to leave her alone for this long time. But together, we have decided that it would be the best to make this experience.
At our home, we eat at least one time at the day together to talk about what happend at the afternoon and what we will do the next day.
My father, who is 42 years old and works in the IT industry, left me and my mom when I was six years old. Now he has a new wife and lives at the “Möhnesee”, one oft the most beautiful lakes in Germany. I still have a good relationship to him and I see him every second Saturday. When I visit him we watch videos most of the time or work in the garden together.
Sadly I have no brothers or sisters. But I love children and that is why I would be happy to have some in my new family in America.
I would describe myself as a very friendly person. I’m outright for new cultures and lifestyles. My grandma is deeply religious and so it wouldn’t be a problem for me to go to church with my new family. In books, I have read a lot about the religion in America and that it is very different to our catholic religion here in Germany.
I’m alwas candid and helpful. I help my mother with the work, which is to do in our flat and I always try to help someone when he has a problem.
Most of my friends have animals. I love to play with them when I am at my friends’ house. I would like to have a cat or a dog too, but my mother has an allergy and so I have to be content with my three fishes.
Maybe I can tell you now how a normal day in my life looks like. I wake up at 5.40 a.m. Then I have a breakfast with my mother and after that, I take a shower like every morning. At 6.55 a.m I leave the house and take the bus to my school. The “Phoenix secondary school”, which is a school with over 700 pupils. I’m in grade 10 now and I’m very determined. School usually ends at 13.10 a.m. Here in Germany we get marks for our social behavior and our motivation. If you have a look at my report card, you will see that I’m a really good and willing student. I like to go to school because it is my dream to become doctor and that for, I have to be very good at school.The second foreign language I speak is french. This is also a very interesting language for me, but I think English is much better ;).When I had my first english lesson in grade 4, I realized that this is a very nice language and I decided to learn it as good as I can. Now, after nearly six and a half years of english, I have decided to ammend my english. And so my dream grows to spend this one year in America, to feel the school spirit and to learn something about this great country and other cultures. But above all, I want to feel the “School Spirit” at the american high schools because I have read so much about it and im very excited to experience it myself.
Every day, I arrive at home at 13.30 a.m. Then I have lunch and do my homework.In my freetime I spend a lot of time with my family and friends. Three time a week I go to my grandma’s home after school and she cooks for me because my mother has to work. In the afternoons I often meet my friends and we go shopping, go in the parc or watch movies. In winter we go ice- skating every week. At home I always listen to music. My favorite singers are Leona Lewis and Justin Timberlake. I love their songs.
When we have the money my family and I spend our christmas holiday in austria for skiing. My grandma comes from austria and that is why we have also relatives there where we can sleep during our holiday.
Every week on Thursday I do a paper route to earn more poket money. I do this nearly for four years now. When the weather is good, I enjoy it to make a walk but when it rains, I’m always happy when I’m back at home.
Every Friday I go to the home for the elderly to accompany the “creative hour”. At this offering I paint with demenzia patients pictures, which makes them remember old times. It makes me happy to see that I can do something good for this people because without my help, they wouldn’t be so fortunate. Mostly there are over six persons who wants to draw with me for one hour.
At the weekend I learn for school and do my homework like everyday. After that I venture something with my mother or I visit my friends. My mother and me have many things in common, we both like the same stores, the same tv shows and we both like to eat. That is why I sometimes cook with my mother. Together we prepare a meal for us and my grandma.At this point, I have to write that I am a vegetarian. It all began when I was in Spain in the last summer holidays. I have seen this poor animals in ther cages at a farmer’s market and I decided for me that I will never eat meat again. But I’m sure that won’t be a problem in my host family because I’m not very ambitious. I eat everything and I also taste food which I do not know. There won’t be any difficulties and I don’t demand that you cook special food for me. My mother also doesn’t cook other meals since I’m vegetarian. I eat the same things just without the meat. I hope you will accept my opinion.
My dear host family, I hope you have enjoyed to read something about me and maybe you like me. I’m really excited about meeting you in summer and I hope that we will have a great and exciting year. I want to be a part of you and I want to live in harmony with your family. I’m willing to conform me to your life. It would be nice to hear from you soon.

Many greetings your Jenny

LG Jenny :slight_smile:

3

Wow das ist ganz schön viel was du geschrieben hast!
Danke, der brief hat mir schon ein ganzes bisschen weiter geholfen!:):):):):slight_smile:

4

Kein Ding :wink:

Mach ich doch gerne…

5

hey
ich geh nächstes jahr jür 10 monate in die usa. ich weiß noch nicht genau wohin, aber meine organisation hat mir geraten schon mal mit einem brief an die gastfamilie zu beginnen. könnt ihr mir vielleicht ein paar tips geben was besonders wichtig ist und was ich besser nicht schreiben sollte?

anne

6

hey …also ich denk mal du sollstest
infos über dein tagesablauf dein wohnort deine family deinen freunden
und auch noch n bisschen was über deinen charakter deinen Hobbys warum du unbedingt in die USA willst mitreinbrngen
Am besten schaust du dir mal den brief von der Jenny (weiter oben) an weil ich glaub in dem steht alles wichtige drinnen
liebe grüße vicky

7

hi Paula,

ich würd den Brief auf jedenfall persönlicher schreiben.
wann fährst du nach Afrika???
Das find ich total toll.
Meine Freundin möchte dort auch gerne hin, aber alle sagen das es viel zu gefährlich ist.
Sie sucht Leute die dorthin fahren.
Vielleicht schreibst du ja Rundmails…???
Kannst du sie mit einbeziehen???
Das wär so toll!!
Liebe Grüße

8

also in so einen Brief sollte man einen man schreiben, warum man das überhaupt machen will und was man sich darunter vorstellt in das andere Land zu gehen, aber es sollten nicht zu hohe Erwartungen gesagt werden, da die Gastfamilie sich dann unter Druck gesetzt fühlen könnte. Und man sollte was über seine Famnilie und vielleicht auch was über Freunde schreiben… Außerdem etwas über deine Hobbys und Interessen, was du in deinem Leben und auch nach dem Auslandsaufenthalt machen willst. Du kannst dich selber mal ein bisschen beschreiben, also was dich so ausmacht. Erzähl etwas von deinem Tagesablauf etc. etc. Das wichtigste ist, das sie dich ein bischen dadurch kennenlernen…
So hab ich es auf jeden Fall gemacht…
LG

9

Ich bin auch grade dabei meinen “dear host family - letter” zu schreiben…

Muss man da der Gastfamilie schon danken oder erstmal nur etwas über sich erzählen???

Lg imke

10

Auf jeden Fall gleich im ersten Satz bedanken!!!

Viele Grüsse

Kirsten

11

OKay, dankeschön!

12

Also ich musste be iE zwar bisher noch keinen brief an die gasteltern schreiben aber bei der bewerbung muss man über sich selbst und die erwartungen schreiben…vllt hilft dir das ja auch ein wenig…

My name is Julia Ditzer, I was born on the 24th March in 1994 and I’m living in Bennewitz, a village in Saxony. I really like Saxony, even if lots of German say, the people here have a strange dialect. But that’s why I feel at Home here. However I’m even very interested in other countries, their culture and the traditions. I’ve already been part of school exchanges to England and Russia. These were great experiences, because, particularly in Russian, I could experience a quiet different life. In this way I learned to be much more tolerant, because I think even other values are important and not only the ones I know, and to be not very demanding but to be more open-minded with regard to other opinions and experiences
I think this attitude can help me in the year abroad, because even in the USA I’ll experience things, which are strange and new for me. But I don’t imagine that it’s a problem for me but very interesting, because it’s exciting to get to know the everyday life of a family, what is initially unknown for me, and try to adapt in this family and help them. But I don’t think that I could perfectly adapt myself to the language and the everyday life in the first weeks. I think this process will take a bit more time, because I’ll change myself, too. But, in my opinion, that’s normal. But I’ll find new friends early, I think, because I’m not really reserved. I like to meet friends and do some sports together, so I hope I’ll do a lot with them after school in the USA. I hope that I’ll spend a lot of time, with my host family, too. So we can get to know each other better and build up our relations. Maybe I can see the Statue of Liberty or any other well-known sight, but I don’t assume that, because I’ll not spend a year abroad for holiday but to get to know to culture and the people. I’m especially curios about the High School, I’ll learn at, and the famous “School Spirit”, I’m unfortunately missing at my school. I think it’s great, that pupils can choose between so many different subjects in the USA, because so they can deepen their interests. I hope my High School offers psychology, because I’m very interested in it and I want to study it and on my school there isn’t a psychology course. I even don’t think it’s bad that school is until the late afternoon, because the lessons are much more varied than in Germany and I won’t have much time to spend with my friends on the evening, so I’ll mostly just see them at school. Of course the lessons will be in English, so I’ll have some problems in understanding everything at the beginning. But that won’t continue, in my opinion. I think homesickness will be a problem for me, too, but I don’t think it will be very hard, because I never were homesick before. However I’ll miss my family and friends, because they are the most important part of my life now. Hopefully my host family and my friends in the USA will help me to get over the homesickness, if it’s very hard. When the year abroad is over I’ll miss them a lot, I think, because they’ll become the most important part of my life. So I’ll try hard to continue the contact and maybe I’ll visit my new family and friends again, when I’m a bit older. It would even be good, if my host family and my German family will meet each other some when, but I don’t think a lot about it, because it’s a long time until I’ll spend a year abroad and I first want to enjoy my stay in the USA, even if it’s not always easy. But I think I’ll lose some tears, when I say goodbye to my family in Germany and when I say goodbye to my host family in the USA. But however I’m excited to get to know the United States of America, their culture and mainly the people, even if it’s more than one and an half year until I’ll do this.

PS: Beim auswahlgespräch v. EF mussten wir nen brief an die gasteltern schreiben. mir ist da garnihcts eingefallen. zum glück habe ich im frühjahr nochmal eins, weil ef sich bei mir im austauschjahr geirrt hat. da kann ich mich dann nochmal besser darauf vorbereiten :slight_smile:

13

Mal eine Frage zu dem Brief: Wird er geschrieben, damit eine Familie sich den passenden ATS aussuchen kann, also praktisch bei der Bewerbung, oder nachdem die Familie ausgesucht ist und etwas über den Familienzuwachs erfahren möchte?

14

Sowohl als auch ;). Jede Organisation handhabt das Unterschiedlich!

Viele Grüsse

Kirsten

15

Ja es kommt beides vor.
Meistens ist es aber so, dass die potenzielle Familie mehere Profile geschickt bekommt, inklusive Studentletter und die sucht sich dann anhand der Informationen einen Schüler aus, oder auch nicht :smiley:
Ich habe meinen Brief „einfach“ so persönlich wie möglich geschrieben, hat zwar ziemlich lange gedauert, ich denke ich habe ihn so 10 mal überarbeitet nachdem er „fertig“ war.

Und meine Gastfamilie hat mir gesagt, sie fanden den Brief so toll, dass sie mich sofort genommen haben und sie wussten von Anfang an: „She is the one.“ :heart:
Auch meine Austauschorganisation hat mir den Grund geschrieben, warum meine hostfamily gerade mich genommen hat: „wonderful letter“
LG

16

Hey,
ich schreib auch grad den brief an die eventuelle hostfamily und ich würd mich freuen wenn ihr euch das durchlesen könntet un mir helfen es zu verbessern
Das wär echt nett :slight_smile:

Dear host family,

first of all I want to thank you considering hosting me. It would be very great to spend one year of my live as a member of your family.
My family consist of 4 ½ members: My mum x, my dad x, my big 20year old brother x, my lovely cat Timon and me. I have a really good relationship to my parents, I can talk with them about everything and they support me in my decisions. It’s normal for me to help my parents in the household, I’m used to set and clear the table to clear out the dishwasher or to help my mother in the garden. In the last years we went ski and snowboarding, this is always a great experience and so much fun. At the weekends I like to go swimming or shopping with my friends we love to make DVD-evenings, too. I also like reading, my favorite books are the twilight saga, 13 reasons why and the joker. In the last time I’ve sometimes pimped and / or designed clothes. I’m not a professional, but I think the main thing is enjoy doing it. In my free time I sometimes work on the videos I’ve filmed with my camera. I share this passion with my best friend Sarah. Sarah and I know us since the kindergarten, we make a lot together, we go to the movies, we chill out in the park or we only hang out and talk a lot. I think it would be great to find some new Hobbies in the US, maybe a sport I’ve never done before.
I would say that I’m an open-minded, friendly, optimistic and spontaneous person. I love it to see and try new things and to travel in foreign countries.
The reasons why I’m going to make an exchange year are clear: I want to find out how other people life by getting a member of a new (I hope your) family, to make friends of the other side of the world, to learn something about an other culture, to feel this famous school spirit, of course I also want to perfect my English skills, but the most important thing for me is to have a really good year with a lot of new experiences. (In private I’m very excited to have a locker  )
At the moment I attend the 10th grade in “Gymnasium” this is the highest kind of school you can visit in Germany. My favorite subjects are English, Sports and Art. All in all I have a lot of fun with my friends in school. A normal school day starts at 755 am and ends at 100 pm, when I come home I eat lunch, then I do my homework and the rest of school stuff.

Dann nochmal danke und so und tschüss kommt noch hin …

17

Hey,
einige Sachen sind von dir zu wörtlich übersetzt worden! Das passt so nicht, auch die Grammatik stimmt hier und da nicht. Außerdem solltest du das richtige Apostroph (’) verwenden, und keinen Akzent (´).

Ich würde außerdem die Passage mit dem Skifahren evntl. rausnehmen, weil es das schwieriger machen könnte, eine Gastfamilie für dich zu finden… Hier ist es normal Ski zu fahren, aber der Großteil der Amerikaner ist noch kein Ski gefahren: Es gibt nur sehr wenige Skigebiete, die dann sehr teuer sind. Viele Gastfamilien denken dann, dass du erwartst, mit ihnen auch skifahren zu können (oder fragen sich, ob du dich dann auch in Arizona wohlfühlen würdest) - das ist auch eine Sache, die mir die Gasteltern hier in Norddeutschland häufig erzählen, weswegen sie Schüler lieber nicht aufnehmen würden… Wenn du das mit dem Skifahren als schreiben willst, solltest du meiner Meinung nach am Ende des Briefes noch stärker betonen, dass du auch offen für andere Sachen bist und dich auf ein GANZ ANDERES Leben freust. :slight_smile:

Außerdem finde ich, dass es ein bisschen hin- und her gehoppelt ist (sorry), du solltest das nochmal re-strukturieren.

Ich weiß zwar nicht, ob es ratsam ist, wenn ich deine Sprache überarbeite, denn dann haben deine Gasteltern einen ganz anderen Anspruch und eine ganz andere Vorstellung von dir, aber ich würde es sprachlich so ausdrücken:

Dear host family,

at first I would like to thank you for considering to host me. It would be awesome to spend one year of my life as a member of your family.
My family consists of 4 ½ members: My mum x, my dad x, my 20-year-old brother x (big solltest du hier weglassen, wenn du nicht implizierst, dass er richtig fett ist :smiley: - dass er dein großer Bruder ist, sehen sie am Alter!), my lovely cat Timon and me. I have a really good relationship with my parents, we can talk about anything and they support my decisions. :slight_smile: It’s self-evident to me to help them with the household, I’m used to set and clear the table, to clear out the dishwasher and to help my mother in the garden.
In the past years my family and I went skiing and snowboarding, which always was a great experience and so much fun.
On the weekend I like to go swimming or shopping with my friends. We love to have DVD-nights, too. I also like reading: my favorite books are the twilight saga, 13 reasons why and the joker (Ich kenne die Bücher mit ausnahme von Twilight nicht, aber du solltest die Titel in Anführungszeichen setzen! Und das hier wirkt ein bisschen zu sehr aufgezählt.).
Lately, I once in a while try to improve and/or (re-)design clothes. I’m not a professional, but I enjoy doing it.
In my freetime I sometimes work on the videos I’ve filmed with my camera. I share this passion with my best friend Sarah. Sarah and I have known us since the kindergarten, we do a lot together, e.g. going to the movies, we chill out in the park or simply hang out and talk a lot.

I believe it would be great to find some new hobbies in the US, maybe a sport I’ve never done before.
I would say that I’m an open-minded, friendly, optimistic and spontaneous person. I love to see and try new things and to travel in foreign countries.
The reasons why I’m going abroad for a year are obvious:
I would like to find out how other people live by getting a member of a new family, to make friends on your (= direkt ansprechen! persönlich!) side of the world, to learn something about your culture, to feel your famous school spirit, of course I also want to improve my English skills, but the most important thing for me is to have a really good year with a lot of new experiences. (In private: I’m very excited to have a locker!) :wink:
At the moment I attend the 10th grade of the German “Gymnasium", which is the highest kind of school you can visit in Germany. (Das solltest du umformulieren, ich finde, das klingt ein wenig arrogant… Die Amerikanische High School hat den Anspruch alle Schüler “durchzuziehen”, d.h. du wirst auch auf seniors treffen, die kaum lesen können!) My favorite subjects are English, Sports and Art. Altogether I have a lot of fun with my friends in school. A regular school day starts at 7:55 am and ends at 1:00 pm. Then I return home to eat lunch, afterwards I will do my homework and the rest of school stuff (the rest of school stuff - darunter kann ich mir gerade nichts vorstellen???).

Sprachlich ist dieser Brief noch lange nicht perfekt, aber ich will ihn nicht komplett ummuddeln. Meiner Meinung nach solltest du noch viel an diesem Brief feilen, ohne dass du dich selbst dabei verlierst. Du solltest die Gastfamilie näher ansprechen, wenn du denn ein persönliches Verhältnis wünschst ;), und nicht immer allgemein von “dort drüben” reden. Der Brief ist meistens das, was die Gastfamilie entscheiden lässt, ob und wenn ja, welchen Schüler sie aufnimmt!

Die Gründe, weswegen du in die USA willst, solltest du nicht einfach so aufzählen, das wirkt nämlich langweilig, sondern clever hier und da erwähnen. (z.B. den Locker, wenn du über die Schule schreibst, usw.)

Liebe Grüße,
Wiebke

18

Hey,
ich habs nochmal verbessert, wär nett wenn sichs nochmal jemand anschaut …

Dear host family,

first of all I want to thank you for considering hosting me. It would be awesome to spend one year of my live as a member of your family.
My family consist of 4 ½ members: My mum Uta, my dad Thomas, my 20-year- old brother Axel, my lovely cat Timon and me. I have a really good relationship with my parents, I can talk with them about everything and they support my decisions. I love it to do something with them, we watch films or go to eat an ice cream in the city on the weekend. I would like to do something with your family next year. It’s self-evident to me to help in the household. I’m used to set and clear the table, to clear out the dishwasher and to help my mother in the garden. I’ve a lot of relatives, the most of them live in the east of Germany. We visit them as often as possible. I love to celebrate Christmas with the whole family, sometimes it’s a little bit chaotic but it’s nice to be together with my uncles, aunts and cousins. I’m curious how Thanksgiving and Halloween are celebrated, because we don’t celebrate it in Germany.
At the weekends I like to go swimming or shopping with my friends. We love to make DVD-nights, too. I also like reading, my favorite books are “the twilight saga”, “13 reasons why” and “the joker”. In the last time I’ve sometimes pimped and / or (re-)designed clothes. I’m not a professional, but I think the main thing is enjoy doing it. In my free time I work on the videos I’ve filmed with my camera. I share this passion with my best friend Sarah. Sarah and I know us since the kindergarten, we make a lot together, going to the movies, we chill out in the park or we simply hang out and talk a lot.
I believe it would be great to find some new hobbies in the US, maybe a sport I’ve never done before.
At the moment I attend the 10th grade in secondary school. My favorite subjects are English, Sports and Art. All in all I have a lot of fun with my friends in school. A normal school day starts at 755 am and ends at 100 pm, when I come home I eat lunch, and then I do my homework. I’m looking forward to feel this famous school spirit I heard a lot about. (In private: I’m very excited to have a locker .)
I would say that I’m an open-minded, friendly, optimistic and spontaneous person. I love it to see and try new things and to travel in foreign countries.
I decided to do an exchange year, because I would like to find out how other people life by getting a member of your family, to make friends of your side of the world, to learn something about your culture, of course I also want to improve my English skills, but the most important thing for me is to have a really good year with a lot of new experiences.
It would be so great when you give me this amazing chance to spend a year as a member of your family.

Greetings from Germany

19

… bzw. ich hab ihn schon geschrieben.
und es wär echt nett wenn den auch wer kontrollieren könnte :).
also nicht nur sprachlich sondern auch ob ich den inhaltlich so lassen kann ?

vielen vielen dank im vorraus :).
Meli

Dear Hostfamily,
my name is Melanie, but my friends and family just call me „Meli“ and I am 15 years old.
I am from a little village near xxx that is a small city in Germany. The village is called „xxx“ and about 1000 people live there.
Though it is so little I really like it, because I have a lot of friends here. For example there is Sarah, my very best friend. We often meet after school to do sports, take photos, watch DVDs or just to talk. Besides Sarah I also have Verena who is Sarah’s smaller sister and Theresa as my better friends here. Together with Sarah we often meet. And we have a special tradition: We go once a month to our favorite pizza place to have dinner together.
I have more friends in „xxx“, but those are the most important ones.
Then I also have friends at school. I spend a lot time with Anika, the person I sit next to, but most of the time I am with Veronika, Julia and Tatjana when I am at school. We also meet after school to go shopping, to the cinema or to an outdoor pool facility.
I spend a lot of time with my friends and they are very important to me.
So is my family. My parents and my brothers, who are 17 and 13 years old, are very important persons to me and I can always count on them and their advice.
We are having dinner together every day and we often do things like going to a restaurant, visiting a theme park or visiting relatives.
Of course, we sometimes have arguments, but we soon make them up.
I think my family and friends make me to the person I am.
But what person am I?
Well, if I had to describe me in 3 words it would be cheerful, friendly and creative.
So, why did I chose those words?
I chose “cheerful” because I am usually in a good mood, I love to laugh and I laugh a lot. Especially when I am with Sarah – most of the time we’re together, we’re laughing. But I have to add that you surely can take me serious because I can differentiate between fun and sincerity and I usually know when jokes are appropriate.
I selected “friendly”, because I always try to be nice to every person, even he or she isn’t very likeable to me, I treat every person with respect and I am always happy when I can help people to find a solution to their problem. I also think you can have interesting conversations with me and I am never averse to talk.
The last one I picked is “creative”. I think my creativity is one of my biggest gifts and I always have funny ideas like writing an article for the students’ magazine about a “Maths dream travel”.
I have also asked my friends what they think I am like and words fell like “spontaneous”, “humorous”, “intelligent” or “outgoing”.
Then, what also affects my character is what I like and what I dislike.
Like said before, I like my family and friends and I also like animals. Ive ridden for 5 years, but 2 years ago I had to stop ridding because I couldn’t manage it with school and my other hobbies. Ive also had 4 guinea pigs, but 3 of them died because of a tumor and the other one died because it missed its sibling. Since the age of 7 I would love to have a dog, but my mother doesn’t want one.
Another thing I like is sports. I have played soccer in a team since about 8 years and I started dancing in a group about 2 months ago. In my free time I also do other sports like ride the unicycle, different kinds of ball sports or swimming.
Another thing I like is music. I listen to music a lot but I can’t stand music that is too loud. I mostly listen to the bands that are in the german single charts and my favorite bands are “Paramore” and “Flyleaf” (but this band isn’t that famous here in Germany as far as I know!). But as said I don’t like loud music so you don’t have to worry about being bothered by my music.
Now there are also things I don’t like.
I can’t stand conflicts, especially when they are physical. I always try to avoid arguments and when they have to be then I handle them with words and not with beats. Violence is horrible to me.
What I can’t stand, too, are show-offs and arrogant persons. Though I try to stay calm and be friendly to them they truly bother me.
Of course there are a lot of other things I like and don’t like, but those are the main ones I think.
What you still don’t know about me are my hobbies.
I love to do sports, especially soccer, to dance, to listen to music, to sing (discussable if good or bad), take photos, play indoor games, watch DVDs, read, and of course I enjoy meeting friends.
When I have no free time I am at a German grammar school (this school type is called “Gymnasium” here in Germany) and at the moment I am in the 10th grade. Most of the time I like school, but I can’t stand all the tests we have to pass. The subject I like least is Physics and the subject I like most is English which also was a reason that made me decide to take part in an exchange program.
But not just because of the language: I would love to get to know to your country and its traditions and habits, because reading and hearing about those things like the sociability of the Americans has always fascinated me. And also your school system really interests me, because I think you have much more possibilities than we have here in Germany. Here in Germany you only have 2 choices: in the 6th grade you can decide whether to take Latin or French and in the 8th grade you have the choice between the “natural scientific department (you get the subject “Chemical Education)” and the “language department (another language like Spanish). The other subjects are all given. But in the USA you have huge sample of subjects. This sounds very interesting to me.
So in the end of my letter I wanted to say thank you that you have taken your time to read my letter and I hope I am the right person for you to become a member of your family.
Yours, Melanie

20

Hallo ihr beiden…

Erstmal mein Senf zu Loan94:
Ich find den Text so eigentlich sehr gut (okay - ein paar kleine Fehler sind drinne, bzw ich würd ein paar sachen anders schreiben. ABER - ich finds irgendwie doof, wenn der Text zu perfekt ist, und dann die Gastfamilie die Überraschung hat, wenn sie das erste Mal mit dir sprechen :slight_smile: )
Das einzige, was ich nochmal überarbeiten würde, das wäre der letzte Teil, in dem du schreibst warum du das ATJ machen möchtest. zerteile den EINEN Bandwurmsatz doch in 2-3 kürzere Sätze - dan ist es bedeutend einfacher zu lesen :slight_smile:

Und jetzt zu deinem Text, Melli:
“Together with Sarah we often meet.”
-> was willst du damit sagen? Dass ihr euch oft trefft? ich finde das ist ja oben schon gesagt ^^
“And we have a special tradition: We go once a month to our favorite pizza place to have dinner together”
–> denk dran: Zeitangaben kommen eigentlich an den Anfang oder das Ende des Satzes :slight_smile:

Generell finde ich es persönlich irgendwie etwas verwirrend, mit den ganzen Namensaufzählungen :slight_smile: Da soll mal einer durchblicken :wink:
Naja - und deine Freundinnen nennst du alle bei ihrem Namen, von deinen Brüdern weiss die Gastfamilie dafür aber nur das Alter :wink:
“Of course, we sometimes have arguments, but we soon make them up.”

  • unter “to make something up” verstehe ich “etwas erfinden” ^^ du meist doch sicherlich, dass ihr sie beilegt (also “we solve them”)
    “But I have to add that you surely can take me serious because I can differentiate between fun and sincerity and I usually know when jokes are appropriate.”
  • warum “You can make me serious” und nicht “I can also be serious”?
    “I have also asked my friends what they think I am like and words fell like “spontaneous”, “humorous”, “intelligent” or “outgoing”.”
  • Da mal ne Frage an die anderen (bin mir nicht sicher ^^) - gibts im englischen den Ausdruck “words fell”? Ich kenne ihn jedenfalls nicht, möchte aber nicht die Hand ins Feuer legen, dass es ihn auch NICHT gibt ^^
    “I`ve ridden for 5 years”
  • Ich finds eindeutiger zu sagen “I’ve done horse-back riding for 5 years” - I’ve ridden klingt in meinen ohren komisch
    (Off-Topic: du hörst Flyleaf?! sau geil :slight_smile: )

Ansonsten finde ich das nen ganz schönen Text.
Du beschreibst dich und deine Umgebung darin, zählst zwar auch ein paar Wünsche auf, aber es kommt nicht so fordernd rüber (vielleicht auch weil es keine besonderen Wünsche sind - das Schulsystem wirst du ja sowieso konnen lernen. Und bei den Aktivitäten, die du mit deiner leiblichen Familie aufzählst ist auch nichts dabei, wo sich die Gastfamilie denken muss "OMG - wie können wir dieses Niveau halten ^^)
Was ich eben etwas unglücklich finde (hab ich ja schon gesagt) ist die Tatsache, dass du “alle deine Freundinnen” namentlich erwähnst, aber deine Familie garnicht. Das kann so klingen, als ob die Freundinnen dir wichtiger sind als die Familie, weil du sie ja mehr erwähnst.

ich hoffe meine “Kritikpunkte” sind für euch verständlich, und ich konnte euch damit etwas helfen.

liebe Grüße,

Martin